During my life I have been given the following labels: Introvert, Sensitive, Loner, Quiet, Shy, Disconnected. These are the core labels and I am sure there are many others. At this point in my life, I feel like those labels are actually symptoms which don't align with the suggested life path we are asked to follow. My judgement is, I live in a world that expects me to fit a prescribed mould. It's no wonder that I spent so much time feeling anxious and overwhelmed.
I spent the majority of my life judging myself for being different than others. I saw the world very differently and had different interests. I also thought that I needed to be like others and tried to be like them. This resulted in a lot of inner conflict. I created beliefs and judgments from what I experienced externally. When I reflect back on my childhood, I can remember so many situations where I got into trouble for being me. I lived in a world where adults said things like "Why can't you be more like...."
I came into this world with childlike innocence and wonder, trusting everyone and everything. Then at some point my world view began to change, it was no longer safe to simply be me. I started to judge myself based on the expectations and judgement of others. I started to compare myself to others and in this comparison made myself wrong. This inner story snowballed and silently affected my experiences and relationships. Then one day I started to question this story. Does this sound familiar?
A true story about SH*# with an interesting twist. Specifically, this story is about other peoples dogs poo bags. This morning I was walking by the golf course and the Mamquam River and noticed a big bag of dog poo sitting at the side of the trail. I thought to myself; is it my responsibility to pick up that bag of poop and take it to the garbage can? I don't even own a dog, and what will people think as I walked back carrying someone else's bag of poo. Gotta love the constant dialogue of the inner critic. I must say that in other parts of Squamish, the bags of poo are hanging from trees like Christmas ornaments.
This week Robin Williams gave us the gift of a collective wake up call. Will we press the snooze button? We could easily have a discussion about any of the following topics; suicide, depression, anxiety, loneliness the list goes on. All of the topics I just mentioned are symptoms, that invite us to look a little deeper. I have spent a lot of time this week reflecting on how I have felt over the years and how far I have come. To be honest its difficult to truly connect to what
What if I told you that the key to being at peace in the world is within your reach? Do you want to unplug from all the drama that you experience or witness in your life? Do you want to understand your reactions to people or situations in your life? I know those questions sound a bit like a commercial is coming your way.... I promise that if you read on this article will contain the answers to set you free.
So first a little bit of teaching. Carl Jung first gave us the term "shadow" to refer to those parts of our personality that have been rejected out of fear, ignorance, shame or lack of love. His basic notion of the shadow was simple: "the shadow is the person you would rather not be" (excerpt from Dark Side of the Light Chasers by Debbie Ford) Here are some
Disclaimer :-) Even though I am writing and sharing about this topic, I am still very much a student. That's a nice way of saying; I am human, have made lots of mistakes and have and will continue to be an ass at times in my relationships.... So here is some of what I've learned up until now!
Whether we encounter someone in an intimate relationship or have to work on a project with a co-worker or are planning something with a friend. What I am sharing will apply to any relationship.
Being accountable is about taking action towards your ability to respond (response-ability). I think we have all been there, in the heat of the moment we say or do something that we feel cannot be taken back. Swallowing your pride can be really difficult as can losing a friendship. On a deeper level our relationships serve as a "mirror" for personal growth. We continue to react to that mirror until we own what we are seeing in the mirror.