I had an interesting experience today at work in regards to anger. I have recently spent some time listening to Panache Desai, and loving what he has to say about our life journey. I first saw him on Oprah Super Soul Sunday and I have also watched a couple of his interviews on YouTube. There are a couple of things that he says that apply to what I am sharing today. Firstly, he says that, "our job is an excuse for which you get to love people." This has really been a thought in the back of my mind recently. I have worked at Starbucks for many years now and I encounter a broad range of people. My thought is, "Love Everyone".... wow, that might be a stretch. The other piece that Panache speaks of, is embracing our emotions and allowing them to surface, be present to them, feel them, notice them. Our emotions are energy in motion and allowing them to move and to experience them is a good thing.
Okay, so this morning at work I am head down, making drinks and I am almost finished making a drink. A customer comes over and says "Hey, can you make that Cappuccino dry?" The drink is 90% made already. Sometimes I can flow with these things, sometimes I just can't. So I looked at him and said, "Sir, I'd be happy to do that for you and it would be really helpful next time if you said dry at the time you order" Well he got angry, I don't remember what he said but he was very angry, body language tone etc. So I look right at him and I say, "Wow, you really are angry this morning, aren't you? He doesn't say a word, he turns around and looks at the newspapers. Then my self awareness hits.... I notice the fire rising in my body and I say to myself "Wow Ross, you are very angry this morning." Humility strikes again. So rather than beat myself up after the customer left, I practiced what Panache spoke of. I allowed myself to feel the emotion and let it rise. I didn't judge it. I just let it go. I asked a co-worker to take over for me and then I went on a break. The anger did not stay with me and the rest of my day was great. I did not analyze, why I was angry, or think about what childhood experience it was attached to. I simply felt it, noticed it and let it go. The experience didn't ruin my day. In this moment, I am grateful that the customer mirrored to me, my anger and frustration. I am also grateful that I can share my experience of being human. The more I can "BE LOVE" during these types of situations the more I am loving myself.
3 Steps to Embracing Anger:
1) Breathe - Deep down into your belly. Count to 8 and repeat 4 times. Connecting to your breath, brings you back to yourself and into the present moment.
2) Leave the situation - Take a time out. We are energetic beings. Stepping away from a situation is also about breaking away from the energy attached to it.
3) Do something physical - Get some fresh air, go for a walk. Shake off the energy.
These steps are useful in situations that are mild in nature. When experiencing more severe anger, you may need to seek the support of a professional.