Fear Stories

In recent days I have been pondering a desire to write about stories of connection and it's relationship to our everyday lives. It was on my walk this morning that I remembered something I feel is fairly significant. It is what I will call the "Fear Stories" that keep us disconnected from our world, each other and ultimately ourselves. I believe we are allowing our fears to drive the bus. I say that because for most of my life that was absolutely true for me and I simply accepted it as a normal state of being. I accepted that all the feelings that go along with fear were normal, I simply didn't know any different. As children we come into this world with a sense of innocence and wonder, accepting everything as is. Then we begin to experience situations which go against this innocent view of the world. These situations create our "Fear Stories".

Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones. ~ Thich Nhat Hanh

I have to frame this story by going back in time. I have lived in Squamish for almost 20 years and for the majority of that time I avoided walking in the trails unless I was with someone. I had a fairly intense fear of Bears. In April of 2014 I attended the New Warrior Training Adventure which was created by the Mankind Project. I had an experience that put me on a new path of exploration of growth and my inner landscape has not been the same since. One of the shifts in my outer world was that my fear of walking alone in the woods had almost dissappeared. I began to walk alone around the Mamquam golf course which is something I would never have done before. Walking in nature has played a significant part in re-connecting to my true nature.
​

This morning I decided to go for my usual walk around the golf course which I have done quite a bit this week. Twice when walking with others we encountered bears. I was a little surprised because I was not scared. The bears are out and about right now getting ready to hibernate so there have been many sightings in the community. As I began to walk this morning I became aware that I was alone, there were no cars in the parking lot and I just knew that I would likely not encounter anyone else. I spent the first part of my walk in a heightened sense of awareness with a hint of fear. As I walked I contemplated my fear while connecting with the beauty that surrounded me. Eventually I let the fear go entirely and was able to connect with nature and be present to the experience.

What I realized about this "Fear Story":

1) I have never in my life had an actual experience / encounter with a Bear. My fear was a product of stories I have heard and been exposed to. I really can't remember the origin. I do remember spending a lot of time in the forest as a kid and not ever thinking about bears.

2) The mind is a wonderful tool that helps us to analyze and store information. The mind also quickly creates the most wonderful works of fiction that become our fear stories. I noticed this morning how excited my thoughts became as I opened the door to fear. Endless scenarios that took me immediately out of the present moment.

3) Fear creates a disconnection from my true nature. Walking by the river and the trees is a magical experience for me. The forest is overflowing with metaphor and teaching and beauty. When I open the door to fear I am closing the door on myself and disconnecting with my outer world.

4) This fear story kept me from exploring creativity. When I walk in nature I take pictures. All the photos on this website and on Facebook etc. have been taken as I connect with nature. Below you will find the photos I took this morning.

5) This is just one fear story. The majority of my life has been spent jumping from one fear story to another.

My story of "connection" is rooted in fear. As I walk towards a deeper sense of connection in my life, I reflect on where I have been. It is my hope that you can see yourself in this story. What are your "Fear Stories" costing you? What is the world missing out on when you are connected to your fear stories?